The Mystery of Giving
By Robin Bush, ISR Communications
We live in a world that emphasizes self-interest and personal gain as the route to happiness, ignoring the one thing that contributes more to our quality of life than any other: giving without expectation of reciprocation.
For centuries, great thinkers and scientists have speculated about the reasons humans give. Today, scientific research reveals giving as the pathway to lasting happiness. “Human beings have survived as a species because we have evolved the capacities to care for those in need and to cooperate.” – Dacher Keltner, Codirector of UC Berkeley’s Greater Good Science Center.
When we see a need we wish to help resolve, we give our time or resources, which in turn makes us feel good. Those good feelings make us want to engage in other opportunities to help others, producing more good feelings. It’s a very positive cycle.
Where do those good feelings come from? When we give our time, talent, and resources to others, that selfless act produces dopamine and oxytocin (the “feel-good” chemicals in our bodies). Through fMRI (functional magnetic resonance imaging) technology, we have learned that giving changes blood flow and neuron activity, activating the same pleasure centers in our brains as food and sex. (National Institute of Health) This may partially explain the giving/feel-good cycle.
When we shift our lives to prioritizing the well-being of others and actively giving our time, energy, and resources, we fuel our sense of purpose, fulfillment, and connection with others. When we give from the heart, we don’t expect something in return, yet giving produces great returns for us through benefits to our physical and mental health. Did you know that engaging in giving may reduce your blood pressure, reduce stress, and even boost your immune system, which promotes a positive mindset and reduces depression?
Selfless giving means you don’t give for the benefit of yourself or out of a sense of obligation; you give for the benefit of others. The impact it ultimately has on you is the unintended positive consequence. Selfless giving grows from your beliefs and values in the importance of being kind and helpful to others in need and an acknowledgment of what you are grateful for in life. When you feel abundance, it’s common to feel compelled to share it with others and connect you more deeply with those around you. Giving doesn’t need to be something grand. Even the smallest gift has value. Giving may mean giving your time or money; for some, it may mean coupling your skills and interests with the needs and abilities of others. When we find the right match, the more we give, the more we stand to gain. Rarely is what we receive in the same form or even from the same source; in fact, it may come from surprising sources and unexpected ways. “Helping others may just be the secret to living a life that is not only happier but also healthier, wealthier, more productive, and meaningful.” Jenny Santi.
Some thoughts on giving from voices across time from around the world:
- For it is in giving that we receive — Saint Francis of Assisi
- The sole meaning of life is to serve humanity. —Leo Tolstoy
- We make a living by what we get; we make a life by what we give. — Winston Churchill
- Making money is a happiness; making other people happy is a super happiness. —Nobel Peace Prize recipient Muhammad Yunus
- Giving back is as good for you as it is for those you are helping, because giving gives you purpose. When you have a purpose-driven life, you’re a happier person.— Goldie Hawn
- Giving is the most satisfying thing you’ll ever do. — Jenny Santi
A book to learn more: “The Giving Way to Happiness: Stories and Science Behind the Life-Changing Power of Giving” by Jenny Santi